NoHope1 Offline

Hi, how are you?

So school is starting tomorrow. I feel no stress for it really. I mean Codi and me are both gonna have a hard day because we're away from each other and I know it might be harder for her because she starting at a new school which sucks but is also a really good thing for her. I'm just going back to where I've been, with people that I know. Like Sabrina and Kyle ou and Haiden. I'm trying to say that I can do this for everything so that way I don't have a small voice in the back of my head saying that I can't because that little voice will over power everything. So I just wanna try that out and see how it goes. I got some new clothes and new shoes which I guess I like. I kinda tend to pick out thing's randomly when I feel like I'm surrounded by people. I hope that this year is better. Oh and I'm moving to Codi's when I'm 16 and my sister just tried to kill me with a bat the other day and now I have to get a job and pay for the door that she beat down trying to get to me but that's all whatever cause CAS clearly does not give a crap about the children they're supposed to help protect. But anyway I hope whomever is reading this is having a good day and I hope that you all continue to have really good and amazing day's because everyone knows you all deserve it.

I don't want to be alive.

Okay so lately I've been weighing myself a lot... I really hate my body. There's more cut's and bruises then there is flesh lately. I don't want to make anyone depressed or make them hate me but I'd really like some help... I feel like my mind is suffocating...

It's been a while since I last posted about how I was feeling... Lately I've actually trying to get my life together and I'm not doing the greatest. But hey at least I'm trying.. Right? A good friend of mine who went missing a few months ago and they found his body a few days ago... That put me in a really bad mind set because I talked with him just a few days before he went missing and he ended up joking about life and death... Which seemed funny but now that I think on it more and more it keeps depressing me thinking that maybe I could've said something though I'm not even sure how he died... Also I have been going back into old habits since now I feel more depressed and in pain than I really have ever felt. Like I have broken down in class because a wave of voice's were saying thing's in my head and it just made me so depressed I ended up laying down and crying my eye's out. I've been smoking but not a lot because I don't wanna end up what I was like when I was smoking a crap ton. I've also cut open my leg's again. Oh and the worst part of all this is for the past few months I've been feeling a really bad pain in my back and I have to take pills that make me dizzy and make my stomach feel weird but it numbs my pain. Well I should go to bed... So uh good night?... Please message me if you have any advice for anything. I'd really appreciate it.

I might have a break down soon. I can't do the same thing over and over again. I feel like I'm in a endless cycle of depression and self hate. Ugh I wish my parent aborted me.

I love that song! Hi Casper, I'm Izzy.

Hey I was lookin at your bout me side, the song Scars is that the one by Papa Roach?
Oh Im Casper btw and I really like your profile

Wow it’s been a while.. I’m in high school now. People have been leaving more and more.. people are still talking about me and then acting like my friend.. I’ve tried 58 to end it all but nothing seems to work so far.. so nothing has really changed I guess..

I found an app to help me with my problems. So as sad as it is I'm not gonna be using teen help that much anymore.