Yeah, I guess is it a part of the faith journey. I suppose I had my faith crisis when I was still debating whether He was real or not, if that makes any sense. I'm not in a Christian home, so my understanding of Him was...skewed.

And you will be stronger because of this. Don't give up. That's about the worst thing you could do. Don't turn away from God. And I want to tell you how happy I am that you are actually seeking Him. Some Christians, especially in America, label themselves Christian but don't act like it. They go to church and can point the blame-finger easily, but they themselves sin just as badly as those they condemn. My poor, screwed up America...
However, I also have a judging issue, but my judgements are rarely spoken aloud. I'm still working on that problem. No worries.

That girl you met...Well, I half-way do not believe in coincidences. Then again, sometimes I do. I suppose it depends on the situation. Or actually, maybe not all coincidences come from God. The devil probably has knowledge of this too. All this is my speculation; you'll have to figure out what you believe for yourself.
The timing fits well. Maybe this girl is an answer. God sticks people in our lives for a reason. Only time will tell, and for a while you may be clueless on how this girl made any difference in you.

I met a girl, actually she met me by speaking to me first (I used to be shy...Still am to an extent, but less so.) and she became my best friend...in my mind. She has her own best friend; I'm not sure what I am to her. But she taught me what a real friend was...I learned how to love more...and perhaps the bitter lesson is knowing she'll never be my best friend, but I'm okay with it because I'd never want someone else taking my best friend from me, so I wouldn't do that to her best friend. Did that make sense? I don't want to tear her away from her best friend, because I wouldn't want someone doing that to me.

And God will help you out. There's some verses in the Solomon's-writings-area that say something along the lines of, if you ask God for wisdom, insight, etc, He will give it to you. That reminds me; there's some verses in Matthew, I believe, that say ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened to you. So don't give up!

So if you keep half-believing, will God come through for you? He always comes through...but sometimes not always in the ways we want Him to. I lived for years in a half-belief (honestly, I was avoiding Him; you are doing much better than I did) and He still found me. I was convinced He was waiting for me to mess up so He could send me off to Hell; I was deathly afraid of dying, and of Him. Somehow, He sorted this out. I love Him now.
But I don't think you should do as I did. Seek Him, don't avoid Him. I don't think this is a time where you should wait...Ask God about it...but then we're at the paradox again. How to ask God for advice when you're doubting He exists?
Try to continue. I'm gonna prescribe you a chapter of two of the New Testament every night. If you want, read more; once you get into it, it's actually very interesting. Seek Him, and you'll find Him. Do not stay stagnant in your faith. Keep growing...until the day you die. One day at a time, one day at a time.

The miracles you and your dad see, well, that's pretty awesome. Not everyone gets to see those. Don't let anyone tell you God doesn't do miracles anymore. It's a load of rubbish. The Holy Spirit works the same way He did when He first came to down to Earth...That's my belief. Miracles, healing, prophecy...I think they're still around. Why should God change the way His Spirit acts? But then again, I am human and can still be wrong; who am I to decide what God's Spirit does? This is a topic that has seen much debate in the theological world.
But make sure you're not seeking the miracles, instead of seeking the one who made them. I mean, sure, miracles are great, but we should be more focused on our relationship with God than on seeing miracles. Find the balance, I guess.

So my advice; seek Him, seek Him, seek Him.
The fact that you're trying to find Him shows you haven't given up. Good! You can get past this. The devil is trying to draw you away from your Shepard...Don't give in. Read that Bible! He wrote it for a reason. You can get through this.
And don't hate yourself for this. I'd give you hug if I could. But if I were talking to you in person, I don't think this would come out as well.
And realize that He may not give you a dramatic miracle sign to show you He exists. Perhaps He is waiting to see whether you truly want to find Him...
Good luck! You can do this!
- Collies R Us

Thank you so much! that makes a lot of sense, but I just wish I could believe 110% like I used to. I'm guessing, however, that that's part of growing up, and that every religios person has had their doubts or gotten their faith hurt. Is that probably correct? But it's just the people who get back up and stick through it that become stronger through God?
Anyway, I'm really worried now. I cry myself to sleep every night just praying to God to help me and give me a sign. Well today, this girl who never talks to me and always avoids me started talking to me. Well I talked to her first. But that's not the point...the point is, we became friends and I've been praying for that to happen for a long time. What do you think? Life coincidence or God given miracle? Also, my dad has seen messages from God, seen demons, and miracles have happened to him. And me too. But they're weird...I can explain them all, but only if you want, because I'll probably ramble myself xD
So...if I keep half believing...do you think God will come through for me and I'll believe again? It's scary, because I keep running it through in my head, "I have no one to talk to...not my mom no friends not anyone...except God...the God that I'm challenging even exists." And then I feel guilty about even questioning that, and then I hate myself, and then I'll just cry...

Anyways, thanks again,
~Jess
And lol yes I did see that

I must confess, I had to google this. I couldn't think of a verse, but the one that popped up was really one I should've known. Ah well. It's not a chapter, only a verse.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. (Proverbs 3:5 NRSV).

It's basically saying trust in God, even when you don't understand. There will be times when someone will shove an argument in your face or provide some convincing 'evidence' and it's gonna hurt your faith a notch. You gotta trust Him even during those times.
But how can one trust God if they're not sure He's even real?
You kinda just do it. Like the Nike logo. It's a risk, sure, but I guess that's what comes with faith. A belief in something you can't see or even scientifically prove. Leap of faith? Risk? They're intertwined.

This is not a Bible story, but it illustrates a point well. It's a story about a mountain-climber who climbs alone up a mountainside, but slips and falls. The climber's rope stops his fall, so he stays suspended in the air. While hanging there he surrenders to God and asks, "What do you want me to do?" God says, "Let go of the rope."
But the climber refuses. He was afraid.
The next morning they find a frozen mountain-climber clinging to a rope, two feet above the ground.

For me, the little things keep my faith up when I doubt. Impossible coincidences. People I meet. People I've loved. Little, itty-bitty things that may not be significant to anyone else but me. The big things are worth mentioning, like how much my life has changed since meeting Jesus, but for some reason the little things seem to do it better...I'm not sure why.

So to conclude, I hope my disjointed ramblings have helped you. And yes, read that Bible. I strongly encourage it. I couldn't think of a chapter that deals with that topic specifically.
Are you just starting to read the Bible? If so, I would like to suggest where to start, but honestly, I don't know where would be best. You could start at the very beginning with Genesis and read on through, or you could start with the New Testament. Though if you start with the New Testament, there may be things you wouldn't get. Actually, scratch that. I started with the Old Testament and still didn't understand all of the NT.
Ask God.
I want to warn you, if you do start with the OT, there will be a part where God lays down the law, and it's a lot of rules. The NT helps make sense of of all that...Don't do what I did. I tried to follow the rules. Failed miserably. But that's why Jesus came to save us and to establish the New Covenant. The Old Covenant is the foreshadowing to the the new one.
I'm not saying break the rules because Jesus died for you. No. I'm saying...Oh, this is somewhere in the New Testament. Perhaps one of Paul's writings. He explains a lot very well.

And if you already know all this, and I'm 'preaching to the choir,' then good for you. I just don't want you doing my mistakes. If I'd suggest where to start now, I'd say New Testament. Anyway...I hope this helped.
God bless you Jess.
- Collies R Us
PS: Did you see that? I rhymed.

Hi! I saw your reply to my thread, which really helped by the way, and I was wondering...see, I'm going to read the Bible and I want to find some verses about falling away from your faith, and how you can get back up. I saw that you're also a Christian, so I thought maybe you'd know of a good chapter. I can't ask my mom, she'll freak I'd she thinks I'm falling away from God. :/