Hey! Thank you so much for the message! I see exactly what you mean, I was sort of the same when it came to hooking up. Basically in my mind there and then during the hook up, I say to myself that right now I'm the most closest guy shes with atm. Like I said, makes me feel like I'm wanted. But yeah afterwards it just feels like a bigger kick in the nuts, knowing I can hook up, I can do what excites me, but theres never any emotion afterwards, just a hook up. I never think that far agead, I just go for it, knowing I'll enjoy it.
And yeah I mean fair enough, I know they have their reasons for not wanting anything further.

Thanks again, well I'm applying for the Army, if I get in this time, then I know I'll be able to move out. I know it'll be hard at first with not living with mum anymore, but if I'm able to get some breathing space then I'll be happy as well.

Thanks again

It's very easy to get wrapped up in the heat of the moment. I don't know if this has anything to do with your issues, but i know for me that when i hooked up it was for validation. I thought that if I could just get enough guys to like me, to do stuff with me then i would be happy. Which is the biggest reason why I still kind of do this, i keep thinking that this guy is the one. This last guy is going to be the last time I do anything like this. Never again will I hook up with some stranger or even a friend. Honestly, when it's not in their interest then trust me they are not the girl for you. If you push going slow and they reject you then honestly they aren't the kind of girl you want.

Good luck moving out of your house. Stay with friends that's what I did Also on that note I know that when i moved out it was impulsive and it involved a lot of tears. I told myself for years that I was going to leave and I never did. Take the plunge and do it, because if you don't do it now you won't do it.

Hey, thanks heaps for the reply. Does mean alot.
Yeah I see what you mean about not going to places where I hook up, I did forget to mension that the times I do fall when I hook up is generally with someone I do know, used to develop a little crush say if I went to a club and hooked up, but I'd get over them in a few days. But when at a house party or something and I kiss someone I know, thats when I foolishly fall head overheels. And you right it doesn't fill the void when I hook up, but there and then I always think that in a way this will be the closest I'll be with a girl. So I just do it anyway. I remember one time I said I wouldn't hook up unless in a relationship. In 2 years I hadn't kissed a girl, then just thought screw it, doesn't have to mean anything, it's fun. And then yeah it goes from there. I always suggest to go slow, but it's never in their interest.

Yeah lately with step dad things are starting to fire up. I've just had it with being told what to do when I know for sure that he will have a whinge about something that doesn't mean shit. He expects me and everyone to treat him like a King. And lately I just thought, "Not anymore, I'm taking a stand against him" Yeah I have been rude in process, but just letting him know that he's not any better then me, sadly though, mum has to see and deal with it. I plan to move out very soon to avoid all the hassle and fights, and to ensure Mum doesn't have to see it so she can be happy.