Haha, fancy that. Maybe I'd better look into that option as well.

Um. So, I came here to tell you how familiar your "unremarkable rant" seemed to me, but evidently this has happened before. Which is odd because I'm rarely ever on this site.
The only deviation for me is the future (/life plan). I intend to do humanitarian work, preferably in countries with precarious social and political structures (read: Middle East) so that if I can't enjoy life I can at least help other people and then die before I become too pathetically old. That's better than suicide, I think.
So, for what that's worth. Bonne nuit.

Welcome to the site.
I read your post on the Depression and Suicide Forum. I don't have any advice because I feel like I could've written the exact same post. It's odd to be in the kind of in-between place where life isn't worth living but death isn't worth its trouble.
All of which to say: hi. Hope you like it here.