I'm ok
did you understand what i was saying?

How are you?

You know how people say that the bad thing about painting is that it gives you too much time to think
all that cookie
the good and bad is stuck in there
but when we talk to others we give a little bit of ourselves to them
that makes your head a little emptier so things can "flow better"

... I somewhat followed that...?

Ok think of it this way
you have the layers of cookie
you is you and your consciousness and your emotions
next is some more emotions and world view and other stuff
more stuff

school messes with your top layer but right now your middle layer is being tortured and that's what's making you suicidal

Believe me, I'm happy school has been out for so long! It's starting soon. And I can't handle it. Everything is going to get worse when school starts. Even worse than it already is.

Don't you dare apologize for that
i really care for you
i worry if you have a slightly barely perceivable minor off-day

I understand
I know you hate it but i do think your feeling worse and worse because schools been out for so long

Oh. Sorry.
It's too expensive. I haven't been to therapy in months and my mom is still trying to pay it off. It might take 2 more pay checks for her to pay those off. And I'm suppose to ask her for more therapy?! I can't do that to her.

You said you were feeling more and more suicidal
and i really care about you so that worries me

what do you mean?

Why did it worry you?
It doesn't matter. I don't think I'm continuing therapy like I thought I was.