Hi Julia!!
I am so sorry to hear about your Grandma. My heart goes out to you.
It is perfectly understandable that you would be upset. And you will be for quite some time. Death is a 'funny' thing. I've 'lost' a few people in my life - and it's always a shock. I think what's 'funny' about it - or 'unusual' about it is that it's so final. They are here and then they're not. It certainly forces a person to question the meaning of life and to be curious about what it means - if anything - to be dead.
I hope it was OK to say all of that. It was just on my mind.
Feel free to talk to me about what you're going through - if that is something you would like to do.
GREAT BIG HUG
Craig!!