[i_like_black]

I ban you because lolwut?

Things to check if the car won't start: Is it in Park (auto) or Neutral (manual)?
Do I need to wriggle the steering wheel? (Sometimes they lock.)
Is my foot on the brake so I don't randomly go careening down a hill because I left my handbrake off?
Did I leave my lights on and drain the battery?

But usually the first two are the ones to look out for