Whoa, okay. I caught a lot of 'ruining my future' in that post, so let's examine that. Getting counselling and being put on antidepressants is actually a positive things. I'm not sure if you're willing to begin recovery yet, but even if you aren't, this could be a sign. The tools you need to get better and stop cutting are there--all you need to do is take advantage of them. If your doctor knows about your cutting and has prescribed you medication to help with your mood, then I'm guessing the scars on your leg will be a non-issue. Try not to be super paranoid,
TH is a pretty safe place.
Going through counselling and starting on antidepressants is a positive thing and I doubt it will ruin your future. If anything, it'll make your future possible. The feelings you're having don't go away on their own, and it'll be pretty hard to pursue a career in the air force or FBI dealing with a self harm addiction. You gotta just take this and run with it. If you need a chat, msg me
xoxo