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Acheron Offline
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Re: Random-ish question: Do you think being raped counts towards your virginity? - June 7th 2012, 01:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Revolution View Post
I'm going to say no, but really, my question is: Why does it matter? Virginity is just a stupid construct in society. First, the hymen thing, it's just a myth. You never break your hymen, your hymen is already "broken" (or has a hole in it) by the time you have sex (unless there is something wrong), you can find more about this here. Second, virginity is just a construct to shame people for having sex, and to give an idea about "adulthood." It's a very heterosexist weird idea, since only heterosexual people have "virginities" according to this weird definition, and I'm not sure why we should hold that idea over victims' heads. "You're dirty because you didn't consent to have sex." How does that make any sense?
I'm with Traci on this, although I think that even in a sex-positive context, people will still value the loss of "virginity" (under a more inclusive definition than the traditional one) so long as it represents some kind of success.

But, given that connection with success, I think that being raped wouldn't count as a loss of virginity. Physical definitions of virginity (loss of hymen, penetration of vagina, etc) all crumble under the application of logical argument. Far better would be to treat the loss of virginity as something emotional rather than physical. It's the decision to become sexual with someone that matters (and the corresponding "surrender of innocence" and so on), and therefore rape is no more the loss of virginity than being robbed is a charitable donation.



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