[Laurasaurus]

Dear Family,

You know what?
Just go fuck a tree.
You have no right to ruin my life the way you do. You have no right to call me those names. You have no right to say that I'm selfish when I (try to) take time out of my day for other people on Live Help, though you wouldn't know. You have no right to call me psycho. You have no right to call people like me "weird" and say that we need mental help. You have no right (or reason) to try to kill me (though you have). You have no right to call me on the phone just to say those things that you did to me. You have no right to leave me and (I think) one other person worried sick. You have no right to hurt me. You have no right to do those "things" or even threaten to do them to me. You have no right to say (or do) any of the things you do, because you don't know the first thing about me.

Nobody should have to be put through what I consider torture and abuse on a daily basis, by ANYBODY, let alone FAMILY. You can bet your sorry asses that the second I turn 18 I will be out. You will never see my sorry, selfish, psycho, deserving to die self ever again. You are just a self centered lowlife that I shouldn't be involved with. I don't need to grow up, you guys do. You think I don't know much about how the world works, but I bet I know more about this cruel place than all of you put together. Do I need to explain further? I may not be beautiful, but I'm not ugly either. YOU are. ALL of you.

I DON'T HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS! I don't. I don't have to let you win either. I can survive, and then flaunt it in your faces. You all think everyone would be better off if I was dead, well guess what? I'm going to prove you wrong. I'm not going to let myself kill me. I won't. I can't. You know how competitive I am, and I'm not going to let myself lose this battle.

To mom- This isn't just a "phase" that I'm going through mom. It isn't "peer pressure," like you say it MUST be. I've been like this for as long as I can remember, I've just started to act on it fairly recently. Also, what do you think "punishing" me is going to do? Make me stop cutting like you said it would if I ever did cut? (NEWSFLASH! I DO already.) You say you know the world. You say you understand why "freaks" do these things. You don't. They say a mother knows more about her child than the child, they must be liars. You don't know me, and you don't care to.

To Elliot- I don't want to spend another second thinking or giving a fuck about you.

To Grandma/JoAnn- Go fucking screw yourself in a corner you narcissistic bitch! Also, see above note to Elliot. Finally, this might make me a horrid person, but I don't care. I hope you fucking DIE soon. I will NOT go to your funeral (other than to celebrate), I sure as hell won't miss you, and I will not, under any circumstances, cry.

I can't keep on living like this. I need to get out. I can't really talk about all you do to more than, oh, I don't know, one person? Be proud, all of you. You killed a person inside. But you know what? She's going to survive, because I SAID SO. She may have to wait, and suffer, and cut, and cry. But she's gonna be alright in the end. She's gonna get help, and live happily on an island in the Bermuda Triangle with a tiger named Vince.

Fuck you.

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You asked. I answered. There's more. I can go into detail if you want, but I doubt you do. I'm tired anyways.

Goodnight good people of Teenhelp.