[shimmeringfaerie]

I think that in a way, you are overreacting. We can't control our dreams, and we can't completely control our thoughts either. However, we can control what we say and I think it was very disrespectful for your girlfriend to tell you what she was thinking. I can't imagine anyone thinking that their partner would be happy to hear them say that they found their friends attractive or that they had a dream about having sex with someone else, so I can't understand why your girlfriend thought it was a good idea to tell you this. If she feels guilty about her feelings... Well, that is her issue. It was not fair for her to make you feel bad in order to make herself feel better.

Honesty is good in a relationship. But there is always a limit, and I don't think honesty is a good thing if it is going to hurt someone else unnecessarily. Which is what happened here. You didn't need to know that your girlfriend has feelings for other people, it was clearly only going to hurt you, so it was completely unnecessary and actually rather mean for her to say it.

If it was me, I would talk to her about my line between good honesty and too much honesty. I actually do talk to my fiance regularly about the things I want to know and the things I don't want to or don't need to know. That way, I know that he is being honest with me when it is important to me and he doesn't stress about what he should or shouldn't tell me. I think that if you and your girlfriend discuss when things should or should not be said, then you probably won't have this problem again.