Thread: Dirty Little Secrets.
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Tigerlily. Offline
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Name: Cheye
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: Nevada

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Re: Dirty Little Secrets. - November 17th 2011, 09:21 AM
Almost every night lately I dream about smoking or when I'm living with my dad how maybe I could make it a habit. I used to be the social smoker that never really got urges, but I'm starting to get addicted I think and I don't want to stop. I don't care about all the crap in them or how they shorten life expectancy, etc... I don't care and I just want to be able to go and smoke when I want to and not have to hide it from parents.
I'm addicted to laxatives and although the side effects scare me, I don't want to stop.
I'm addicted to the feeling of my empty stomach and if it's not growling in hunger I just want to die for failing.
I'm not ready to get better again, I love the feeling of hunger and losing weight, the feeling of the blade on my skin, and I deserve to hate myself.
I want to kill myself again and I don't think I'll tell anybody this time.
I sort of wish someone would tell on me who knows I don't eat so I'd have to get help.
I still love him even though he has broken my heart 3 times or more in 2 months.
I deserve the pain I'm in emotionally, I deserve to be abused my aunt, I don't deserve the freedom I may soon be getting.

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Last edited by Tigerlily.; November 17th 2011 at 09:43 AM.