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Re: Say something you wish you could say to their face. -
June 21st 2011, 10:01 PM
Every time I hear your voice I want to scream at you! I want to hurt you, I want to hurt myself. Every time you speak I just want to yell at you and make you shut up! No matter what you're saying, all I can hear is the women that would hate me if she knew what I hide from her. If you knew I was bi, you'd disown me. If you knew that I have an eating disorder, you'd hospitalize me and never take me out again. If you knew I still cut, you'd buy me the make-up and clothes to cover the scars and the scabs. I'm sorry that I'm such a fucken screw up, I'm sorry I'm not the perfect daughter you want me to be. I'm sorry that I'm not good enough for you! I'M SORRY I'M NOT FUCKEN PERFECT BUT CAN'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING? WHY CAN'T YOU SEE WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO ME? Why can't you see that I started throwing up after you kept calling me fat? Why didn't you notice the cuts on my arms after you said anyone who isn't straight is going to hell? Why didn't you notice that I screamed at you when you said homosexuality is wrong? WHY AM I NOT FUCKEN GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU? I'm sorry that I'm trying my best. I'm trying my best and it's killing me, but that's okay. It's all okay because you know that as soon as I break, you can blame me. You can blame the pressure I put on myself and you can play the loving mother like you pretend you are. I'm sorry I'm not perfect. I'm sorry I'm who I am. I'm sorry that you ever told me your opinion. Because of you I'm ashamed of who I am. Fuck you mom. Fuck you.
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