[LoveFever]

This is not about me, it is about you. Stop pretending I was the one who messed up. All I did was confide in you. All I did was love you can care about you and expect you to do the same. Silly me for believing everything you said. Silly me for falling for all of your lovey-dovey crap.
I wish, sometimes, that I had never responded to that Facebook message from a stranger. That I had never allowed you into my life. That I had not put so much time and effort into making you happy and seeing you smile. I wish I could have seen what you were going to do to me, how you were going to break me.
But, despite all the hurt you've caused, I can't help but remember how you made me feel all those months. I can't help but remember the stages we went through. the changes we both made for each other. I'll always remember that part of you, the part that made me smile like mad and giggle and blush.
I don't know what to do anymore. It hurts so much to see you, knowing I'll never get my chance to really let you know how I felt. Yes, I told you I loved you everyday, but that's not even close to ho I felt. It doesn't even begin to describe the feelings I had for you, the feelings I still have sometimes.
The worst part is that I know what happened, and I know you know, too. I know it was the distance, I know that. I know it would have been too hard to attempt a real relationship, but we knew that the whole time, didn't we? Why did we let ourselves fall in love when we knew it wouldn't work?
Please don't cut me out of your life just yet. I'm not ready to lose you. Not ready to move one, find someone else. I wish you would just talk me me, about anything. Even small talk, like when we first started talking. You had a girlfriend then, too, remember? Why is it different now? What makes this girl so much more special than the last? So much more special than me? Please, just don't leave yet.
I love you so much, I'll always remember you. Always.
<3