[St.Vincent]

I think it's a legal issue, not a philosophical one. Also, she's carrying the child right now, not him, so abortion choices would have to come from her. And anyway, this argument has no place in an established legal order.

I would advocate for adoption.. even though it is a hard bond, there are open adoptions. Instead of pressuring her to abort like James seems to want to.. pressure her toward this option if you feel like you can't be a good father.

But if she says she wants the baby, you have to own up and decide if you want to stay or pay dues and be another absentee father. Life is a bitch, huh?

And really, you are 19 and apparently made the choice that you're ready to marry. In some countries, 19 is a perfectly respectable age to start a family, and you will be able to do it.. there's nothing stopping you from being a good parent. That's around the time my mom had me, and though my childhood was unconventional and a little rough, I've pulled through.. thanks to a large part to my family.