[bitesize]

I'm going to feel sooo stupid after I write this because it's probably just my brain being silly, but ugh, just feeling kinda insecure. Irrationally, really, but I'll just get this out. I really don't know why seeing you for those thirty seconds made me feel down. When I think about it it's because I think I would have liked you to seem more enthusiastic about seeing me ~ even though you weren't much less enthusiastic than normal..but then it got me thinking about other things about you that bother me and make me feel a bit insecure. You didn't introduce me to the people you were with...I did only stop and say hi for two seconds but if that was you and I'd been with my people I would have introduced you. I don't think they even knew you were going out with anyone :/ Plus, you never really refer to me as your girlfriend. That mioght just be in my head, but for some reason I'd just feel better if you actually physically called me your girlfriend ~ to me or to someone else. Not that I'm worried that I'm not, or anything, but it feels like I call you my boyfriend and introduce you as my boyfriend more often. Plus I'll always introduce you to people I meet when we're out or whatever... maybe we just see more people I know when we're out though...but sometimes you'll stop to say hi to someone and not tell them who I am, which makes me worry that you don't appreciate me or feel proud to be with me :/ I also wish you liked holding hands more and that we greeted each other more affectionately. I know you're shy and you're not really into PDa's, which is fair enough, but sometimes I wish you were. And I don't know why you untagged yourself from that picture...it's not the nicest of me but it was a fine one of you and it made me worry that you did it because you didn't want people to see you together with someone that looks a mess. I just wish you kind of showed that you appreciated me more, because I know you do. And the stuff we said last night meant a lot to you, I know. Also I want to meet your family. I know you're shy and I'm your first girlfriend but sometimes I wish you'd kind of mature up and act like a proper boyfriend. Seeing you this morning should have made me feel good but it made me feel bad and I don't really know why. This is probably just me being irrational and it'll be fine when I talk to you again. But I do think these things sometimes.

Really don't want to go back into college now