[xx_fallenangel_xx]

Hello everyone. My name is Anne and I am new here. I just want to tell you my story because I think I might have an eating disorder. What do you honestly think?

Two years ago, I was in 8th grade. I was a cheerleader and involved in my school musicals for 4 years. Everyone in my class always thought I was perfect. I had perfect grades, was well-behaved, was a good singer, and everyone loved me. But while they saw perfection, I saw that I was so imperfect. At my lunch table, my friends began to take my food from lunch. For example, if I brought 5 items for lunch, I would only have 1 left for me. But i began to like that feeling of emptiness. So everyday I would pack a lunch that I knew I would give away to other people and only have 1/5 of it for myself. And no one seemed to notice what I was doing. From March-June I contiuned to do this and lost[Edited by Crux: Please do not post weight numbers or calories] . While on vacation that summer, i can clearly remember my mom telling me that I looked like I was gaining weight. And for her to say that, that meant that I wasn't perfect like I wanted to be. So I started to restrict more for the rest of the summer. As high school started I went to an all girls school. I made friends and gradually started to gain the weight back. After my next physcial I began to restrict again. I would only eat [Edited] cals. max at lunch. Most days I would only have [Edited] cals. by eating 1/2 a baby carrot. I also began to excessivly exercise, burning around [Edoited] calories every day before school. I restricted my calorie intake to only [Edited] calories a day. [Edited] Max. I lost [edited]bs. I got very weak. I couldn't focus in class, was always sore, and was mentally losing myself. I lost interst in all my hobbies and stopped talking to everyone. I am isolated. But i still restricted. But my body had stopped losing weight. I gained [Edited]lbs and since then I have gained [Edited] pound. I look at myself in the mirror and hate myself, weigh myself constantly, and always count calories. But i need to reach that perfection everyone tells me that I should be. Because I just need to be perfect.