[MadPoet]

Jack,

I understand where you are coming from, believe me. I've had depression for two to three years now, and I've felt quite similar to how you are feeling. It's easy to lose sight of why we're even alive sometimes, and life can seem like nothing but a meaningless collection of days randomly thrown together with no purpose, basically.

When we're feeling depressed, though, we aren't fully able to see reason. A certain situation might trigger the depression, such as you breaking up with your boyfriend. And after that, it's difficult for us to see life as we normally would. We are stuck in a negative state of mind, and if that depression had not been triggered we would be looking at things a lot differently.

So the key is getting that positive state of mind back. Using reason; seeing beyond the depression, looking at life as you normally would once again. Sit down, make a list of all the problems that you feel are causing you to feel depressed. Set goals for yourself that will allow you to solve those problems, and to put them in the past. As you do this, your depression, if it is caused by these problems alone, may slowly begin to improve.

However, your depression may be more of a problem in itself. Sometimes it's not problems that cause your depression, its depression that causes the majority of your problems. Depression can have many causes, and in this case I think it might be important for you to receive professional help.

You obviously have enough reason left in you to know that suicide is not an option. But before you lose that reason, I think it's really important that you talk to someone about this, as well as continue working on trying to solve the problems you feel are causing or are related to your depression in any way. Maybe think about visiting a therapist or a psychiatrist. If this is something that ends up being necessary for you, you definitely want to take that step before it's too late.

I hope you start to feel better soon. Don't give up! Things can get better. x