argghhhh it really really really gets to me.... you know what, i know you do.
you have suggested that its because of that and you were right.
i just cant admit it to you and make an excuse everytime because hearing it out loud makes me cry.
it really gets to me so much.
thats exactly why i cant concentrate right now, its exactly why im not working right now.
i cant do anything about it and you know it and your still nice to me.
and im just so embarrassed of the whole thing.
because you was never anything like this, youve had the whole opposite experience of what im going through.
you have no idea what its like and thats why i cant talk to you about it honestly.
i hint at it but i just want to scream it out loud but the thought of it makes me cry.
i really cant keep doing it anymore, i know you try to help me but its not enough because im getting nowhere
i want you to tell me what to do but i cant even talk to you about it properly, im too ashamed of how stupid it sounds to someone who has so many amazing things to say.
and all i have to say is... everything was shit and i havent made up for it at all.