1.How would you describe your current sexuality?
I consider myself gay, but I think it's all a bit confusing tbh. I have no doubt in my mind that I like boys on all levels (physically, romantically, sexually - that type of deal), but girls is where it becomes a tad fuzzy for me. I'm very much capable of being attracted to a girl on a romantic level as well as thinking a girl is beautiful, but there is just absolutely nothing there sexually. Nothing at all. Knowing that, I just feel it would be a bit unfair for both of us if I were to try having a true relationship with all of the various aspects with a girl. If I'm going to be in a relationship, I would like for both of us to be happy on all levels. I know that wouldn't happen if I were in a male/female relationship, so I have no interest in being with a girl for that reason. Since I have no interest in being with a girl, that is why I consider myself gay.
2.At what age did you first start questioning?
I'm pretty sure I was 10 or 11 when I first started to realize my attraction to boys, but it wasn't until I was around 16 that I actually accepted the fact that I could possibly be anything other than straight.
3.What events lead up to the point where you decided you where lesbian/gay/bi/trans?
It took a lot for me to get there. I was very much opposed to the idea that I could possibly be anything but straight and I honestly didn't care much for the idea of homosexuality either, so I did my best to deny my sexuality for a good five years or so. Over time, I did open up to the idea of homosexuality and saw that it wasn't nearly as horrible as it had been made out to be to me. Around mid-2007, I had made two very good, close friends and I eventually got up the courage to talk to them about my feelings. Both friends were very accepting of how I felt and made me feel good for finally being honest with myself. They listened to me and helped me sort through my feelings, and after a little while is when I finally accepted my sexuality and new that it was right.
4.When was your first relationship with someone the same sex?
Still waiting unfortunately
5.How did you finally conclude/know that you where lesbian/gay/bi/trans?
Just a lot of sorting through feelings. I had known for a long time that I wasn't really attracted to girls like I was boys and just talking about my feelings and sorting through them is what finally drew me to the conclusion that I'm gay.
5.When did "come out"
I didn't really come out to my friends since they were the ones who helped me figure out my real feelings, but I came out to my mother as bisexual in October of 2007. Not sure when I finally told her that I'm actually gay, but when I did, she came out to everyone else for me even though I really didn't ask her to.
6.How did your friends and family act when they heard? Did people treat you different?
Well, more or less my entire family is very conservative Christian, so I don't figure any of them were too thrilled when they were told. Only one of my sisters (I have two) has actually said that she was alright with my sexuality. I haven't personally talked to my other sister or my father about it, but my mother has made it fairly clear that she doesn't really like it. Despite that, she hasn't been too horrible. My room is slightly covered in posters of boys (lol) and no one has really objected, so that's good. But even so, I still feel like I can't really be open about anything. Honestly, it kinda sucks since I'm a little boy-crazed and boys are my favorite subject, lol. I could have it a lot worse, though, so I'm not really complaining.
7.Any tips for those who are still questioning?
Don't do anything you'll regret. Take your time and figure yourself out for sure, and only come out when you're ready and only to the people whom you know will accept you. I didn't really follow the latter and it has caused me some drama over the past two years. So again, there's no rush, just do everything when you know you're ready to.
- Trysten
