[TheBabyEater]

I'm seriously about to snap. About to relapse at minimum, even though the last 2 relapses have brought my life in danger and the last one cause my boyfriend to break up with me for a week or so. I'm still wanting to do it again.
He's feeling "hollow" and now, isn't talking. And it's freaking me the fuck out. I'm scared for his life, and for mine! He means the world to me, I fucking love him and I really doubt I could deal if anything bad happened to him. Especially if he killed himself because I wasn't able to make him feel better!
On top of that today, my dad waited like... 5 extra minutes, again, after dinner just so he could follow me home so that when we got home, he could nag me on every little god damned thing I did wrong. and today, I almost got in a fucking wreck! My father all but beat the shit out of me! My car is probably going to be taken away later tonight, and you have no idea how much that stupid little inanimate object means to me and what it represents to me.
My relationship with my dad is just getting worse and worse. I'm gonna kill him one day before he has a chance to kill me.
I'm slipping in school and getting C's in classes (i know, big fucking deal. well it is to my parents. I got yelled at for having only 4/5 As and a B)
I'm loosing friends
I've been lied to too often, about serious things like a person's death.
I'm. snapping. I can't do this anymore. I want to cut. I want to put my life in danger. I want to die. And I don't know what to do. I can't go to my boyfriend, because he's feeling down enough as it is, and I'm still scared to talk to him again like that since it's the reason he broke up with me last time.
Just... fuck you guys. fuck. I havn't been this bad in months.