[Lil]

I Knew he would break up with me because i dont deserve to be happy Il always love him still
Sometimes(constantly) i feel like im fading in the background at school
I wonder what it would be like if i just let go..
Always i give small hints to my friends that i need help even when im mean its my way of yelling for them to notice but truly i dont think i deserve the help.
I know i need to get help for my self harming but i dont want to stop
I know i need to get help for my ed but truly i love it
Im scared of death and yet im not
I love you mom but your one of the causes for all my problems
I love that your happy but deep down i wish your girlfriend would break up with you because i want all your attention back
My friends always see me smiling but never see that so smile so godam fake
You wonder when i got this way Ive always been this way im just finally letting it out
I wish i could rid everyone of my horrible burdening self but i dont really want to be forgotten