[FeelsLikeFalling]

Why don't you give a shit about me? Do you even care that my entire life I have felt abandoned by you? I wish you were dead. Because then there'd be a reason for you not being around. For you not caring. I can't handle being dismissed and treated like I don't exist whenever you find a new freaking family. And then the second you're on your own again, being forced to turn my life upside down and be forced to live with you again, to make you think you aren't alone. BUT I CAN'T HANDLE THIS ANYMORE. Either be a Dad to me. Or leave me the hell alone, forever. Because this is screwing with me so much, and it hurts that you don't love me. And how am I meant to heal and be okay with this, if when I'm finally starting to accept the fact you don't care, you do something that just shoves it in my face. I can't do this anymore. Why don't you love me?