[Allons-y!]

Originally Posted by xander

i hate it when you talk about your girlfriend to your mates, and the first thing they say is, "have you shagged her yet?" i hate it, cuz theres so much more to a relationship then that x

Aw, bless.

Definitely agree with the "How are things with *insert name here*?" First of all, if you were in my life, you would inevitably know the state of things with my significant other. As you're obviously not, it's none of your business. Second. We are not one entity. We are actually two separate people, and immediately asking how he/she is doing is not pertinent to the conversation. My life is not irrevocably tied to the life of whomever I am dating. Third, how do you expect me to answer that question? If I were to say anything less than "Fine," you would respond with "Oh, I'm sorry," or some other empty way of consoling me despite the fact that you don't really care.

Why are you so crabby?
Well, I wasn't until you asked that. Now that you've gone ahead and blatantly assumed I'm in a bad mood because of the insignificant way I brushed you off while doing something else, I am crabby. Thanks very much, go fuck yourself. If I were crabby from the start, I would shut myself up where I wouldn't be inflicting my mood on someone else. As you've brought this on yourself, now I'm pissed as hell and will unleash my wrath on you.