[This_is_the_greatest_plan]

Im so sorry youve been through all this. It sounds incredibly painful.

If it helps, I can hear from the way you wrote this that you feel very "down" on yourself, but what happened here couldnt have gone much differently. Either he would have fallen in love with somebody or he wouldnt have, but he was unlikely ever to fall in love with a woman. Thats not a "you" problem, he could have been friends with any woman and he wouldnt fall in love with her.

I cant tell you to be kinder to yourself because only you can choose whether you do that, but if it helps, I can see that his choice of partner says nothing bad about you.
I hope you feel better soon, Soda.