[This_is_the_greatest_plan]

Hi Miso, welcome to Teenhelp!
It sounds like you find being around other people really stressful and that being on your own is a bit easier. Or if its not exactly easy, at least you get some respite before you have to be around people again? If its any help, I know what it feels like to feel self-conscious around other people so youre not the only one. I dont pity you, which is something you mentioned in your post. I empathise with you instead. Your feelings are valid and I promise you, youre not the only person who feels this.