[Moxie.]

Hi Nick,

I'm not sure that there is a specific age when we are "too old" for sibling rivalry. Sometimes siblings do let go of their rivalries and get closer as they get older. Other times, the rivalry is just part of the dynamic of the relationship. For instance, my sister and I are 2.5 years apart and we didn't start getting closer until I moved out when I was 18 and she was 15. On the other side of that coin, a close friend of mine has 2 older sisters - she developed a close relationship with one once they became adults, while she still has a rivalry with her other sister. It truly just depends on you and your sibling and the nature of your overall relationship.

That being said, I can definitely understand how it would be upsetting to have your brother putting you in a headlock, especially as it doesn't sound like it was playful at all. Would it be possible for you to talk to your brother about his behavior? For instance, you could say something along the lines of "I understand that you're upset, but I would appreciate it if we could handle our differences or disagreements without putting our hands on each other". If that isn't possible, perhaps limiting contact with your brother would be beneficial. Since you mentioned him coming over, I'm assuming the two of you don't live together. It may be helpful for you to put your foot down and let him know that you will be setting boundaries around communication with each other until he is willing to handle any differences maturely.

I hope this helped!

Take care.