[Mallika]

Hello there,

Thank you so much for reaching out.

Firstly, please remember that not everyone has a linear path. The traditional path of school > university > career has been challenged by thousands of people. Many successful people I know finished high school and took gap years before going to university. A classmate of mine took a gap year after university because he didn't know if he wanted to pursue a career in the area of the degree that he had earned (I'm not exactly sure what he is doing right now). Others worked for a number of years before returning to school to pursue a degree or diploma in a major they subsequently realised they were passionate (which might have been entirely different from their initial degree). I also know of successful people who opted not to go to university but instead chose to focus on building their professional skills in a career of their interest.

In saying all of this, I'm hoping to convey that everyone's journey is different, especially because our life doesn't always revolve around education and careers. In some cases, people need to drop out of school/university or take a break for personal health reasons, or to care for an ailing family member. Others do so due to financial reasons. There are many other reasons why someone might need to take a break from education.

The very fact that you have reached out to us regarding this suggests that the matter of completing university means a lot to you. However, there are times when we have to prioritise other matters - in your case, putting your mental health first is an extremely important and justifiable reason. There's nothing to be embarrassed about putting yourself first. You seem to be doing your best by going to psychotherapy and receiving medication, which is of course a great step. If they've not been working as optimally as you'd wish, have you thought of switching providers? Or getting a second opinion?

You said you have tried three times but have not been able to finish university. It is natural for any person's confidence to take a beating after repeated attempts that don't go as per plan, so I can understand how you're feeling. However, please remember that a "no" now doesn't mean a "no" forever. It is very plausible that at a more optimal time in the future, once you're faring better in terms of mental health, you would finish university.

I 100% concur with Everglow that you are by no means worthless without a university degree. If it might help and if it is within your financial means, possibly you might want to take a break from this repeated cycle of trying to get back to university and taking classes, and instead focus on an internship or a job that might be in line with your interests, or even a complete hiatus. Once you're doing better and feel that you can go back to university, you can do so in the future.

I can understand that not being able to finish university right now, at this current period, might seem like the end of the world, but it is not. You HAVE a future ahead of you, and you will get the opportunity to do so at a future point. Your chance has not passed. Remember, life happens - be it mental health, other health conditions, familial or financial reasons, etc. - and we have our reasons for not being able to accomplish various things at a set point. You shouldn't beat yourself for not being able to finish university considering your circumstances.

Cliche as it sounds, things are constantly changing. You are not worthless, and you will not stay as you are right now. Possibilities might seem bleak right now, but they will not be forever. Remember that it is OK to put yourself #1; you're not being selfish.

Take care