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No motivation. -
October 24th 2022, 11:52 AM
I've got no motivation to do anything. I keep seeing this thing on my Facebook feed, one of those "suggested for you" thing, and it only serves to remind me of how much I wish I could go back to 2017. In 2017, I did not dream of a pandemic or having that be the perfect excuse to get laid off. In 2017, the world was scary with Trump being president and my niece having cancer; but yet it still felt very much different. I still had dreams and ambitions them; I was excited to do things and get things done.
But now I have no motivation to do anything. I'm still searching for a job — even though I've had a job for several months now — and nothing shows up that I am qualified for. Most of the time, they either require a driver's license, a college degree, full time; and neither of which I have or am able to do. I've started to see a new therapist a month and half ago; but I find her to be incredibly unhelpful. She's focusing on the one thing that I have already dealt with and it's bringing me down.
I can't help but wonder if I'm not worth anything, if I shouldn't bother trying to reignite my dreams and ambition. I can't help but wonder if I'm meant to be a fragile broken snowflake with unresolved traumas inflicted upon me both long ago and in recent times.
I hate feeling this way.
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