Re: My Mom... -
May 25th 2022, 08:24 PM
Hey there,
I'm sorry to hear about what you are going through! In terms of your mom actively discouraging you discovering yourself more, is it possible that she is having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that you are growing up? Sometimes when parents aren't ready to face that, they can really make things difficult.
This may help with the timing of some things: Maybe write what you want to say in a letter? That way you will have gotten everything you want to say out without interruptions such as anger getting in the way. You can either directly hand her the letter or leave it somewhere she'll see it. As I'm sure you know, anyone can use help, not just people who don't have a roof over their head, etc.
If you're still in school do you have a guidance counselor you can talk to about some of what is going on? They may be able to help you find ways to healthily communicate with your mom, and maybe even moderate a discussion between the two of you if that's something you're interested in. That way, nobody talks over the other and if anyone starts to get angry it can be dealt with quickly.
When you do talk with your mom it may help to use "I statements" like "I feel ____ when ____." This way it doesn't sound like you're placing the blame on her, and I statements are supposed to help prevent people from getting defensive.
I hope this helps a little bit!
Dez
Do you ever get a little bit tired of life
Like you're not really happy but you don't wanna die
Like you're hanging by a thread but you gotta survive
'Cause you gotta survive
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