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Hey,

I first want to say that everything you are going through is valid. It can definitely be scary and tough to go through something like this!

I want to start out by saying that anyone can have an eating disorder. It doesn't matter how much you weigh, whether you're overweight or not. There's a stereotype around eating disorders that everyone has to be stick thin, but that's not how it works. You can be any weight, age, race, gender identity, etc, and still have an eating disorder.

Remember that no matter what your size is you are amazing. Your weight does not define you. You deserve to eat when you feel hungry, and to stop eating when you feel full. You can even find healthy foods that you enjoy eating and see if your family will try new healthy recipes with you! You also deserve to enjoy what you eat. Food is fuel and it's what gives you the energy to get you through your day.

If you want to lose weight, it's important to do so in a healthy way. Do you have a doctor you can talk to? Maybe your doctor can give you some tips on how to incorporate diet and exercise into your life in a healthy way.

I know you may not want your family to find out, but you said they pick up on things pretty easily and I bet they'd rather find out directly from you, instead of from you getting very sick later on. For example, what if they got a call saying you passed out at school from not eating and had to go to the hospital? I'd sit down with them on a day when things are calm and let them know you have been struggling with eating lately. An alternative to this is to write them a letter that you either hand to them or leave where they can find it so that you get all of your thoughts out on paper without them interrupting you or you getting too nervous to say key points. Or you can talk to a guidance counselor and have them meet with you and your parents all together so the conversation is facilitated.

I know things are tough now, but you can get through this!

Dez