[Celyn]

I'm not in a relationship and don't have a diagnosis (though I think I might be autistic). I think that if I were in a relationship, or even a friendship, with a neurotypical person, I would want them to:

Avoid using hints. I can pick up on some hints but not all. I'm either going to completely miss the hint, or overthink and worry about whether something is a hint and what the other person wants/expects. I might think that something is a hint when it actually isn't but by then, it's too late and I've already acted on it.

Ask, don't assume. Somehow I attract people that think all sorts of things about me or my life and end up making decisions for me or acting on their thoughts (actually projections) without asking me first. I'm then horrified with the other person who does not understand why I'm not grateful for their 'help'.

Give me a way out of something. I might say 'yes' but I realise I have a habit of going along with things or agreeing when I don't really want to. I find it hard to disagree or get out of things so saying something along the lines of 'you don't have to if you don't want to' and then actually meaning that (not getting annoyed/irritated if I backtrack).

Understand and reassure me. I think I struggle with RSD. It's not too bad right now, but in a relationship it can get really bad. I know it's illogical and not rational. I know there is little reason to be upset. And I worry about being clingy or controlling, and pushing people away by being needy. I need to be honest and get taken seriously so that when I seek reassurance, it's not just empty words. So I need the other person to do their best to be understanding and realise that it's scary to open up when you know RSD doesn't make any sense.

That's all I can think of for now. Though this could apply to any relationship, but in particular those who struggle with anxiety or past trauma.