[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]i dont know how to say any of this without sounding lame. my mental health has been getting progressively worse over the past three years. i dont see any ounce of hope or light in my future. i got to a really tough school and the workload is killing me.i cant quit becuase i dropped out of my last school. even if i quit ill be even more alone. i have no friends and my anxiety just makes it worse cuz its super hard to talk to anyone. and what makes it even worse is that i am very sensitive to things people in my class and my family say so i cant handle talking to them for that reason too. my loneliness is almost killing me. i hate living life as a woman and if i had the chance to transition i would do it(which i have been thinking about alot) but my family is extremely transphobic. my parents are so strict i feel like im suffocating. i dont think theres a single thing about life i like. everyday i wake up and i wonder why im even alive im literally just a dead shell walking around. i dont have any purpose in my life at all. every single feeling expereince and thought is negative. i feel like ive overshared to anyone i know and i want to take it all back so ill prob think the same about ranting here. im ready to die but im afraid of pain and going to hell. ive been telling myself itll get better but it hasnt and im sure it never will.[/size][/color][/font]