[Starseeker]

I have a close friend. We've known each other for four years. I really really liked him at the beginning (and it lasted for a long time, almost a year I think). Then I somehow moved on, had a boyfriend in the meantime etc. but recently I've discovered I have feelings for him once again.

Romantic feelings aside, he's moving to a different country to study in September and I'm so afraid of losing my best friend. He is now away for the next week and I don't know if I will even have a chance to meet him until late August, because both of us will be travelling on and off during the summer.
I've realised that I have so little time left. I wanted to tell him everything I felt, but I didn't have the guts, so I wrote a letter. It's a long letter about everything: depression, meds (he doesn't know about it), my feelings for him, how I will miss him. I attached a self-made green dream catcher. And I sent it today, so he will probably receive it in a week, when he comes home.
I don't know if I did the right thing, and I'm afraid of destroying our friendship, but I think all of this should have been said anyway. I just wanted to tell you here, about this letter and all. Waiting for him to receive it is kind of infuriating