[GoldenSparrow]

Ever since ive went to live with my mom shes been manipulative and somewhat narcissistic. She would scream at me if i was hungry and ate a big lunch and made me cry a lot and when i came out as trans and then non binary she openly admitted to me that she didn't think i was trans and aways wanted a son. shes also been calling me a waste of time and a total failure while giving me the choice of college or the military while trying to force me to join the navy. I've never been hit or physically abused but i feel like what im dealing with isn't abuse and is simply her trying to be a mom but shes also guilt tripped me multiple times when i hang out with friends or try to go outside she keeps me in. Am I being over dramatic or is this something that is serious? because i cant tell if this is a form of abuse or not. and i feel like if i ran away it would make it worse and make me look like a terrible teenager. I dont feel like i have control over my life anymore and i cant do the things i enjoy cause i feel like my mom just pushes it aside and thinks i shouldn't do it. And now when i look back it feels like she only cares about my grades now more than my mental health and the last time i tried to talk about my emotions she sent me to a hospital because of my anger problems and im scared to tell my friends that my mom sounds bad because she says it will make her look like a bad parent. she doesn't do it daily but its kinda frequent but the fact that i cant tell the difference scares me because I feel like if i confront her she´ll play victim and act like im not grateful please help because i keep having thoughts about running away and it feels stupid for me to do so.