[DeletedAccount53]

Originally Posted by Melancholia.

I think it's great that you were able to find a long lost sibling and she was able to bond with your family so quickly! It sounds like she's adjusting very well, and I think a little getaway to help her get acclimated to the new environment is fantastic. I'm wishing you, Julie, and little Tommy all the best.

There is something I do want to give you as a fore warning in case it happens: not everyone wants to be reconnected with a sibling they've never met.

One of my friends found her two siblings through research... and it doesn't seem like their biological mother would ever have been voted for the "#1 Mom of the Year" award. There was some bitter resentment there that must have been refueled when my friend reached out to them. But they were happy to learn of another sibling and bond with my friend.

The point I am trying to make is be mindful of how these long lost siblings might be feeling. Try to think back on the relationship you had with your parents and apply it to these individuals. Do you think they might have fond memories of their mother or father? Depending on how much older they are, they probably disconnected themselves from those people years ago; they buried it in their past and moved on. They now have families and an established career.

This reminds me of my favorite show, an arc that aired a few years ago. One of the main characters reached out to her mother, inadvertently learning she had younger siblings; but the reunion didn't go well. Not quite the same context; but the point is the woman was reminded of a trauma upon meeting the character when she reached out.

Just some things to consider. I know it's super exciting to be reunited with long lost family and wonder about the lives they've lived; but be mindful not only of how they might feel upon contact... but also of how you will feel if they reject you.

I'm glad you gently warned me what to be aware of. That actually was similar to what maman said at the time Tommy was returned to us. Tommy is at just the right age where she isn't a teenager yet, and we all know how sulky they can act towards older parents. We are grateful our little sister has such a bubbly way, but also one of the first things she said was how much she'd been praying to meet her older sisters. As the days went on, so it became apparent that Tommy knew of our existence, but now where we lived.

We are having a great time with our little sis. We love how confident she is when skateboarding, but also never stoops when she walks; Tommy walks tall and she's never shy. But we also know she had a rough time at this orphanage because she told us a lot and because of the emotional pain she endured, so we are being careful in guiding her.

Before went away, Tommy asked to borrow my Speedvagen bike, so I lowered the saddle and off she zoomed though she gladly wore the cycle helmet and knee and elbow pads under her clothes. It's a very fast bike and extremely lightweight, too. I managed to get hold of one because they were a limited edition, very rare. When we return, we will give it to her.

So far, it's not Tommy who is upset at her late mother and father, but Julie and I. That is something that cannot be shared on the forums because it's best kept within my family.

I'm glad you wrote and shared with me those things. Thank you.