[NeuroBeautiful]

Hi,

So I'm having very strong urges to self harm and I have this thing working out pretty well so far, getting to email my therapist once in between sessions. One of the guidelines is that if it is an emergency I have to contact proper professionals (911, etc) instead of her.

I don't know what to do in the case of non-suividal self harm though

I am not even sure if I'm allowed to tell her about the urges in real time. I have mentioned having urges in a retrospective way and making sure to mention that it is no longer active urges. But now it is getting harder to keep myself away from self harm. I wonder if I even have to tell her about it at all if I do relapse. The thing is it would have been a relapse after over 2 years of not doing it.

if I end up relapsing and let her know it was only superficial would that be against the guidelines? I am scared to lose my therapist over this. I am also getting impatient with putting off self harm over and over again and really think cutting superficially might be a happy medium to get what I want and also not make it to the point that I lose my job and have people find out.