[Rivière]

Firstly, he is not your responsibility. His actions are his own choices. He is manipulating you into staying with him and controlling you to get what he wants out of you. If he cared about you in any way, he wouldn't be doing any of what he's doing to you. As Dez rightly pointed out, your boyfriend is abusing you.

The way I see it is that you're only in this relationship with him out of obligation and fear. He's making you fearful. Fear is a powerful way of controlling somebody and getting them to do what someone else wants. He is playing on your fears and worries that it will be your fault if he takes his own life. Again, he isn't your responsibility. You're not is parents. You're not his babysitter. You're his girlfriend, and even then, quite loosely with the way he treats you.

I've been in a situation where my partner used me for sex. They gaslighted me, manipulated me. Made me do things I didn't want because I let them. They used how I felt about them as a way of controlling me to get what they want. If I didn't do as they demanded, there were consequences. I'd be ignored, avoided, all kinds of horrible things. I would beg for forgiveness and would do so until they were satisfied with my apology. They knew exactly how to make me do what they wanted. This is the same situation you are in. He knows exactly how to control you and make you do things he wants.

With all of that said, you can escape it. Talk to a friend or family member. Keep any and all messages he has sent you. Screen shot them if they're through WhatsApp or another platform that allows him to delete what he says. Back everything up so you have proof of his abusive behaviour. Do not allow him to control you any longer!

You deserve to be in a happy, loving relationship. It's most certainly not with him. Pardon me for sounding so cold, but if he chooses to take his own life because he couldn't control you, that's his decision. He will have made that choice on his own. You don't deserve to be treated the way he treats you. You have the strength to move past him. Be the person that splits with him, blocks him, and ignores him. Take his control away from him.

You can do this!