[Mallika]

Hi Sarah,

Thanks so much for putting it all down. I hope it has helped to express it and not keep it all to yourself; you did the right thing.

Now, up till the point I read about you speaking with your assistant manager, I would have thought that your co-worker's behaviour seemed a little suspicious (i.e. that she seemed to be hitting on you) especially about making flirtatious jokes and about suggesting that you to travel all the way to the gym near where she lives. Your male co-worker's comment didn't help either; I would have also gotten confused in your position as well.

However, after reading what your assistant manager said, I think it would be best to give your co-worker the benefit of doubt for now. Your assistant manager has known your co-worker for a long time, and I'm sure she knows her well enough that you can trust what she said about her sexual orientation. So I think you can be rest assured for now. After all, like you said, you wouldn't want to sour your relationship when you're working together.

That being said, I think there would be no harm in observing your co-worker's behaviour towards you in the future. If you feel that she still speaks in a manner that is suggestive of the fact that she might have feelings for you, and you have some good evidence (e.g. a joke that is clearly intended for flirtation purposes), then you could ask her about it. Considering she has a boyfriend, it is technically not appropriate for her to be "hitting" on you.

Also, don't be too worried about your recent feelings towards her. We all go through this from time to time. I'm currently in this weird phase where I am crushing on and stalking a guy whose profile I noticed online and probably have no chance to ever get to know. It's weird and I don't know why I'm doing this, but I guess such things happen to all of us. When I was in school, I was crushing on a junior (girl) though I know that I'm straight, but what happened just happened because I was a hormonal teenager in a girls' school. Special feelings for people develop at some point in all our lives, you're not alone. You already know that she has a boyfriend, so you will not act on them or anything; feelings come and go, don't be too concerned by them

I hope things will get clearer and you will feel better