I'm sorry my posts are negatively affecting you. Please have some empathy and compassion. Nothing I do is to intentionally be bad or mean, or whatever else people think because I seriously am a good person. I do not intentionally harm people, or hurt people, or manipulate or be evil and so on. I am a good person. I seriously am.
This is just the only way I know how to act and get my needs met. Its just my personality. Any body will tell you its hard to change who you are if you don't have a professional like a therapist pointing it out to you and helping you work through it. Currently I do not have a therapist and when I did see a therapist in the past this was never worked on. I'm not making excuses. I am just trying to explain why I do what I do.
Also, to be honest I have not had much social interaction in that I really haven't had many friends or friends that stuck around for a long long time really which I think has negatively affected me. Also I'm almost 30 and have never been in a relationship and never dated. I feel i do not even know how to be in a relationship if I was in one.
I am trying and I do not have to prove to any one that I am trying. Just because you feel I'm not trying doesn't mean I'm not. I can try to not do the hot and cold as you call it. Ill try but again please don't be harsh and expect perfect. I still might slip in to my old/natural ways not intentionally just because like I said I do not have a therapist at the moment to really help me with this. Its not easy changing on your own with out professional help how you think, how you interact and how you get your needs met.
My post are not to hurt any one or get any one upset. You do not have to read my posts if they upset you. I do appreciate your suggestions and advice.
