[Just Peachy.]

Good morning.

I do not participate in polyamorous relationships, but I know a lot of people who have. I had a co-worker. She has two partners. Her primary (who she married) and another man. The primary partner has two as well. And her other boyfriend is married, with a daughter. So everyone in their circle has two partners. They've made this work so beautifully that they all live together.

It wasn't always easy for them, I'm sure. The biggest part of their success is their communication. That wasn't always there. Poly relationships have the potential to yield a lot of hurt feelings if there is lack of communication. Each person needs to be up front and honest about their expectations from the relationship, what would be a "deal breaker", and boundaries. I think in their case, the love is there. For sure. I know that one of the partners has casual flings. But that was communicated. I have talked with my friend recently about her relationships, and she talked about how it is rough sometimes. Communication takes vulnerability and some people aren't ready for that. However, they grow together. They work on things together. But like any relationship, trust and communication needs to be established. The thing to remember is that, much like monogamous relationships, no two polyamorous relationships are the same.

As far as feeling like you're loved less because you got there last, I would talk about that with your girlfriend.