[Celyn]

Hey there,

I'm sorry to hear about the abuse you suffered at the hands of your uncle, and also indirectly, when watching him abuse his girlfriend. No-one should have to go through those experiences, especially not when you were young.

Trauma can affect everyone differently. Some of the common symptoms as a result of trauma include flashbacks, anger and upset at memories or reminders of the event. What happened to you was not okay. There are ways of disciplining without resorting to physical assault. No-one should ever resort to physical assault for discipline and this is also true regarding adult relationships. There are healthier ways of dealing with strong emotions or difficult situations that do not include violence. It is never okay for anyone to physically assault another person, no matter what. It is never deserved or justified.

There is no need to 'stop' how you feel. Your feelings matter and are valid. However, as Eli suggested, you may want to discuss your feelings with a counsellor who specialises in trauma or PTSD. It's natural to feel confused and angry, but counselling can help you to make sense of your feelings in a safe environment. You are not going crazy- these feelings are common for someone who has been through trauma.

I hope you can take the next step and seek professional support. Hope this helps a bit