[Tigereyes]

According to almost everyone, I'm supposed to just suffer. Well fuck that. I deserve better. And if the only way to give myself better is through death's release, then I'll just have to follow the plan I delayed (in case things got better). I don't want to die. I want life to get better. I've stopped hating myself and all that, but my life still fucking sucks, and there's nothing I can do to make it better. If it can look like an accident, apparently my AD&D benefit will at least cover my debt, so no one will be burdened beyond initial grief. Not wanting to burden anyone with my debt was a major reason I was forcing myself to stay alive.