[Tigereyes]

I only left my job to not die of COVID. If I'm going to die now, that's not the way I want to go. I already feel like my body is failing me on a regular basis. If I somehow didn't die, despite being high risk, I'd have even worse permenant disabilities. Which means I'd never be independent, can't pay someone to take care of me, and my parents think I fake my chronic illness. I was going to continue enduring the trauma at my job for another year or two to not have a financial crisis with no hope of getting out. I don't want to keep staying alive only to suffer worse and worse. It doesn't matter what I do to get better. I've made a lot of progress there considering how few resources I have. But if life won't stop giving me a new crisis every fucking day, I can't go on. There's no point. There's a limit to how much a person can handle with no help. I can't afford better help that I've needed for years. I likely will never be able to.