[Rivière]

This is just my opinion here, but I wouldn't worry about having sex with either a male or a female until you've worked out some of your issues regarding your rape. Sexual trauma can affect us in many ways, including whom we want to be with.

I have been sexually abused by 2 male family members. I knew I was attracted to females from the age of around 13, but I was in denial. I came out as gay at the age of 16. However, I ended up having my first sexual experience with a guy at the age of 20. I've had more intimacy with men than I have women, but still continue to identify as gay as it's 'easier' for me. I don't mind hugs, kisses, and intimacy with men now that I've accepted the trauma and abuse that happened to me growing up, but I know I could never be in a long-term relationship with one. Ultimately I prefer to be with women because it's easier for me to connect with the same sex, than the opposite.

People label me as bisexual due to my sexual history, but that's their label and I'd never choose it. I simply go with how I feel... which is again, a strong preference to females. I'd rather not give the impression that I'd be ok settling down in a long-term relationship with a man, when I know I never could.

Everyone is different. What we choose to label ourselves is up to us and no one else, but sexuality is quite fluid. Don't worry about what you 'may' or 'may not' be at the moment. Just take things one day at a time.