[Celyn]

Feel like crying right now. Feel like all I do is mess things up. Like maybe I am just exaggerating and dragging people into the mess that is my life. I feel guilty for having my own feelings and everything that I said. But then at the same time, when nothing made sense and I was in pain, of course I'm going to look for explanations even if that means coming to the wrong ones. And even then, I do wonder if there is an element of truth in the wrong explanations. Simply because I just don't understand why life has to be this way, why everything has to be so difficult and backwards?