[DiafolEternal]

Originally Posted by Celyn

Really glad to hear that you opened up to a friend and that she will accompany you to the doctors!

She did today, I showed her this thread and she was able to put into words and explain it better than I could in person. My meds have been upped, i have an appointment with mental health tomorrow assuming the snow doesnt fuck that up, and a review next week that she is going to come with me for as well

Sorry to hear that you have been struggling so much and broke your SH free record. It definitely sounds like now is a good time to get professional help though.

It is hard when friends know that we aren't feeling well, but don't quite know what's wrong or how to help. It can definitely seem like you have been abandoned, especially when you tried to open up. However, it doesn't necessarily mean that you have actually been treated differently or abandoned. And even if this was the case, it's not a reflection on you.

I thought she was to be honest, but after today i realise that was part of my depression, anxiety and the nightmares (and my lack of ability to tell them apart) speaking and she truly is my best friend through it all and I am so grateful for the love and support she gives me.

It is best to be honest with the doctor. It's unlikely you would get sectioned. You should feel empowered to make decisions about your treatment. I know you don't want to get back into reality and so you may feel unsure about going to the doctors and talking about getting help and recovering. But at the very least, you don't deserve to suffer and if you give treatment a chance, you may find you feel a bit better, even if you can't think about that right now. Hang in there

The honest part is where i struggled, id get there and draw a blank and instinct was to suck it up and not burden others. or just to know it doesnt help to open up based on past and even current experience. my family do not help with this at all and make it worse -_-
Even today, she did most of the explaining and I just tried to answer questions while holding back tears and shaking. but I did it. Tomorrow is going to be hard I think as it will just be me (she has work and life too, cant expect her to be there every time. just need to know shes there in spirit for me) but if i can't say it. I will ask the professional to read my letters. even if i can't SAY it, I will get it across x

Thank you x