[Celyn]

Really glad to hear that you opened up to a friend and that she will accompany you to the doctors!

Sorry to hear that you have been struggling so much and broke your SH free record. It definitely sounds like now is a good time to get professional help though.

It is hard when friends know that we aren't feeling well, but don't quite know what's wrong or how to help. It can definitely seem like you have been abandoned, especially when you tried to open up. However, it doesn't necessarily mean that you have actually been treated differently or abandoned. And even if this was the case, it's not a reflection on you.

It is best to be honest with the doctor. It's unlikely you would get sectioned. You should feel empowered to make decisions about your treatment. I know you don't want to get back into reality and so you may feel unsure about going to the doctors and talking about getting help and recovering. But at the very least, you don't deserve to suffer and if you give treatment a chance, you may find you feel a bit better, even if you can't think about that right now. Hang in there