[Brandon]

You're guilty, but you're not bad. The issue isn't with you; it's with the dude. The dude was in a committed relationship, and as much as you desperately threw yourself at him, he was not obligated to do anything with you. He could've simply chose not to participate in your shenanigans, and that would've been the end of it. "Thanks but no thanks," as they say. You, on the other hand, were single. You weren't in a committed relationship at the time, so you weren't under any obligations. You were free to do what you please. There is a fine line between forcing your feelings on someone, but if you give people the proper amount of space and they pull you closer (figuratively and physically), then again...that's a choice they make. However, it makes you guilty because you're putting them in that situation (aka being alone in a room with someone while everyone else is asleep). We all have temptations and desires, but that's why we avoid particular situations that we know are going to end badly. If we like someone, we do our best to avoid things like that. In the end, it's always their choice, but you don't really help the situation when you bring the temptations to them. In that sense, you're guilty. As you grow up, you learn about sacrifice, self-restraint, and etc. At a young age, it's hard to think about other people's perspectives and whatnot, but you develop that through experience.



Maturity is about not sticking your face into other people's business (messing around with other people's boyfriends and whatnot). You're young, so no one expects you to fully understand that. What would a mature person have done in your situation?



Well, for starters, they wouldn't have been flopping around their relationship status. They would've been clear from the get-go "what are we?" Are we casual? Are we official? Are we open? Being a "thing" is too broad. It's a middle-school term. Secondly, if you and him weren't meant to be together, you would've moved onto someone else. If he came back while you were single, then it was meant to be. If not, whatever. It's life. Sometimes you're gonna fall in love with people who don't love you back, and that's the way life can be sometimes. But that's part of becoming a better person/partner. You deal with the bullshit so you can learn what to do and what not to do.



So you shouldn't feel bad about it. Who is to say he won't do it with another girl while with you? Why stop there? Maybe you'll end up like the girl you screwed over? Who knows? You were single, couldn't handle your emotions, not old/mature enough to handle your temptations, put him in a bad situation that he chose to let happen, and made the choice to cheat on his ex-girlfriend on you. It ain't romantic, mind you, but that's what happened. You shouldn't feel bad, but you should feel guilty about it, but that's part of your upcoming maturity speaking...saying, hey...that's pretty messed up that you're screwing around with guy in a relationship. Sure, he might mess around with someone else, but a mature woman wouldn't want anything to do with that in the first place because her experience would teach her "if he's that easily persuaded to go against a relationship like that, who is to say that he won't do that with me?" How mature could that man really be?