I wish that I didn't feel anxiety about going to that place without my friend's. I'd really like to go tonight but doubt it will happen because anxiety is shit.

I'm also feeling like I don't have friend's. I suck at initiating much of anything and no one is hanging out at the normal place we do....so I am at a place where ... I just don't initiate. I still have friend's and I know they'd be open to hanging out but I can't fucking initiate shit.